In Memory
by ChaosTheDark08
Summary: Cry was in an accident several months ago, and was left with no memories of his life before the crash. When a strange blonde-haired man takes him in, trying desperately to get him to remember his previous life. But with the past and make-believe becoming confused, just who was Cry before? PewDieCry, sequel to Another Day.
1. Chapter 1

_"What is a man? A miserable little pile of secrets! But enough talk...have at you!"  
-Dracula, Castlevania: Symphony of the Night_

**"...Do you remember, Cry?  
...Please, tell me you remember..."**

Its been the same dream for months. A voice, _his voice_, calling out, with a worried expression on his face I imagine. Sometimes he cries, sometimes he sings.  
Sometimes, he's such a mess...I can't tell what he's feeling.  
I can't remember who it is. A male voice, so strangely familiar...but so distorted and far away that I can't tell who is speaking.  
Once I saw a smile in my dreams, as he laughed, saying that he should get a memorial stone:  
_"In memory of Cry, the man behind the mask!"_  
Perhaps I should explain. Apparently, my name is Cry...that's what he calls me. His name is Felix, though he says that I should call him Pewds, or Pewdie.  
I had an...accident, a couple of months back. Or, to be more accurate, exactly 4 months and 16 days ago. I kept track, to show my progress.  
A truck, which was speeding, hit me while I was...I was...I don't know. My memory is a mess. I don't remember hardly anything before the crash, and the few things I do know get confused with what I make up to comfort myself. The lines between real life, memories, dreams and my imagination are blurred.  
For example, I'll be remembering a happy trip to the shops, and it'll be filled with dead bodies, all accusing me of the same thing:  
_"You did this. This is all your fault. Why couldn't you see that?"_  
Then he will be standing there, tears in his eyes as he repeats the same phrase along with the deceased, before running away.  
Pewds took me in, saying that he was my love and he would get my memory back, along with something about forgiveness. I wasn't really listening. I just wanted to get out of there.  
He used to be sad when I didn't remember, and would cry when his attempts to get me to say anything familiar failed. He cried on multiple occasions, at night when he thought I couldn't hear him.  
Now he simply gives a sad smile and says:  
_"Don't worry about it Cry."_  
I think that is worse. I don't understand why, but there is something in those eyes that deeply saddens me. A mix of regret, despair, absolute sorrow and defeat.  
He is supportive however, and hasn't run away, unlike other people. The crazy fangirls, as he calls them, were full of sympathy at first, along with a few hate messages, but over time, as I couldn't make certain references and was an entirely new person, as they said, everyone left. I was still sad at their leaving, and it intensified after I deleted my Youtube account.  
The pain still lingers today.  
Pewds is staring at me now, with a weird look in his eyes. I get the feeling I have done something awful in his mind, but I don't know what, and I think its just my imagination.  
I need to remember to be sure.  
I hope I remember soon.  
_...Because I can't stand his heartbreaking face no longer._


	2. Chapter 2

_"I can't remember anything at all.  
I've been turning it all around.  
I'm sorry, oh so sorry...  
Is this what I have become?"  
-A2, Chosen One_

Pewds hummed whilst he made breakfast this morning, with a big smile on his face. He is usually sad when he makes pancakes, his speciality, as he says that used to be my favourite. I imagine gigantic piles upon piles of them, all covered in a variety of sweet, cavity-creating sauces.  
The taste of them are still delicious, the sugary smell stirring up some form of nostalgic happiness from the old days, when I was myself and Pewdie was happy.  
That leaves a bitter taste in my mouth for some reason. Those summer days, when everything was right, are just out of my reach, teasing me with small sensations but never giving me the full experience. It completely kills off any joy I had eating breakfast.  
The song though, that strange, broken melody he hums, causes such curiosity within me that I am forced to ask him a question that I know will upset him again because I can't remember what he wants me to remember.  
While I'm caught up in my mental battle to ask about it or not, and about the possible negatives about asking it, subconsciously a small sentence slips out unnoticed.  
"...Are you going to stop humming it off-key?"  
My thoughts freeze. I watch him pause, letting a plate fall into the washing-up bowl with a quiet splash which echoes in the sudden silence that follows.  
I panic. I must have done something wrong. There's an unspoken mystery to his body language that frightens me. He is singing off-key, I realise that now, but perhaps it is because he dares not to hit the right note in case the painful memories come back. I am about to apologise sincerely when a small shaken whisper comes from the sink.  
_"...W-what did you say?"_  
He turns around now, staring at me with accusing eyes as he grabs the collar of my shirt. I stammer, repeating myself in a hurry as I stare into his eyes. He pauses again.  
In a last ditch attempt to calm him down, I begin to hum the song at the correct pitch, causing him to cry. I stop.  
_"No! No, Cry, keep going! Please..."_  
Pewdie's words trail off as he begs with his eyes, and I continue, eventually adding some words in there that I remember. He joins in, laughing and beaming with happiness, causing me to smile as well. We laugh and sing at the tops of our voices when we can, and when we are finished, Pewds looks like he used to.  
He says the song was our song, a long time ago. September.  
Ironically enough, I don't remember September, or even that we danced in it.  
Then his phone rings, and he goes away to answer it, beaming again.  
Somehow, this angers me. Something about him on the phone makes my fury explode and I have to control myself to not rip the phone away from Felix...I mean, Pewds.  
Who is Felix anyway? I keep slipping the name out when I think about Pewdie. It just...happens...  
The voice in my dreams stopped talking today. There was just silence in the darkness.  
But I saw him, Pewds, dressed in a new suit and tie, with a blue rose in his hand. He smiled, rubbing the back of his neck with his hand and blushing.  
A small echo wrapped around my head:  
**"You like blue roses right? You're so dreamy..."**  
He laughed, holding out the rose towards me, before a small frown crossed his face, and he turned around, handing the rose to a silhouette in the distance. I tapped his shoulder gently, and saw the anger and fear in his eyes.  
**"Don't you get it? Stay away from me! You're a monster and I want nothing to do with you!"**  
He hit me, again and again, until I was on the floor, bleeding. Darkness began to creep around me, and took me over.  
A small whisper was heard:  
_"...Did you forget?"_


	3. Chapter 3

_"This world..."  
"And my world..."  
"Are in a manner, inextricably linked!"  
-Eggman and Eggman Nega, Sonic Rush_

After I woke up after that nightmare, I thought about the possibility of parallel worlds, of different dimensions. Its a common thing that many people believe, it reappears throughout videogames and movies, its something science likes to argue about.  
Would I still have my memories in another world? What if the roles were reversed, and it was Pewds who had amnesia? Would I stand by him?  
I think I would. I feel a bond, a need to protect him, a man I know next to nothing about.  
I hope I would, at least. He's a really nice guy, who now genuinely smiles more often than before. We sit in front of the television, eating large amounts of ice-cream and other sweet things.  
Once, he fell asleep with his head relaxed on my shoulder. I didn't complain, it was...good...to have that sort of connection, to have his light breathing whispering in my ear, to have his slow heartbeat gently thump against my side.  
We lay there like that for a long time, just snuggled together in the darkness, until he woke up and began to apologise profusely, causing me to laugh.  
"Don't worry about it Felix...its nice to have you back next to me..."  
I stumbled and blushed after I realised what I had said. It was a great feeling, no, an amazing feeling, but that name...had slipped out again.  
I cursed my stupidity.  
To my surprise, his smile grew even bigger.  
_"That's right Cry! My name!"_  
I had to smile then. Pewds...Felix. It made more sense now. That mysterious name was just a vague memory, coming back to me.  
I'm getting better.

**"Cry...please...you need to get past it...I miss you...you need to rest..."**

Another dream. I can't...I can't remember who is talking. Its so familiar...so close...the answer is staring me in the face, I know it is. Its irritating to know that.  
Another voice begins to fill the background, a voice of a higher pitch, a cold, venomous voice of a snake.  
"Nobody cares about you! You should just leave us alone with your problems! He doesn't love you!"  
I know that voice. How could I forget my hatred of that squeaky, annoying little voice that was always at my heels at whatever I did?  
The voice that came out of the phone.  
The voice Felix was talking to.  
I don't even know who she is, but I recognise that tone, and I remember my hatred of it.  
_She ruined me._  
Its the only thought that echoes around my head as I become more and more angry at its presence.  
_You had to get in my way._  
"Why are you still here, you idiot? What about this don't you understand?"  
I crack then, shouting and swearing into the darkness as I hold my head in my hands, hiding from the monster clawing at me from the abyss, forcing me to realise and draw a single conclusion from the mess of my mind.  
_You were the one driving the truck into my skull, laughing as it cracked against the cold, hard tarmac._

I tire of these dreams now. I'm sick of the strange taunts I don't understand, the mystery voices talking in riddles I can't solve.  
He still speaks to her though, and that tears me to pieces, along with the people in the street alleyways that run away from me, screaming and crying as they break bones and cut skin just to escape my presence...  
I can't leave the house anymore. People will yell and throw glass at me, telling me I'm not welcome, that I should go back to whatever hell I came from.  
Sometimes...I think they're right. I'm an outsider here, and I'm obviously hated for some reason or another.  
I keep getting dirt under my fingernails, mud shoved in my face and blood running down my cheeks.  
_Just what am I doing here?_  
Felix pretends not to notice it. He knows, but doesn't like to admit just what has happened to me.  
We just sit there and cry, wrapped in each other's arms tightly, not wanting to let go ever but knowing that a new day is still approaching, and soon the time will come where he will leave me cold and alone to their threats and attacks again.  
I miss him badly when he leaves. Sometimes he's gone for hours, sometimes for days. He never says where he goes, just 'visiting friends' or 'gaming conventions'.  
He always returns with a gift though, to say sorry for his absence.  
Felix is cute in that respect, with his messy hair and general adorableness.  
I wonder how much trouble those puppy-dog eyes have gotten me into...  
I'll cuddle his pillow tonight.


	4. Chapter 4

_"Wake up...and smell the ashes..."  
-Gman, Half Life 2_

Today, I went outside. I had to, I was running out of food and needed some fresh air desperately.  
I needed to clear my mind.  
Felix still hasn't returned. Its been three days and he hasn't got in touch to say where or what he's doing.  
I hope he's alright. I tried to call him multiple times, but his phone is always off, and no-one else knows anything about his sudden absence. Everyone has tried to get hold of him using every method possible, but there's still no reply.  
So, I was walking to the shops when a man, who was obviously drunk by the way I smelt the drink on his tongue from 3 meters away, and how he wobbled and staggered along the street, starts yelling at me, saying that I'm not as tough as they think I am, that I need to be locked away. I ignored him, knowing that his thinking was obviously clouded by alcohol.  
That was, until he punched me in the head.  
I sort of lost control then, like I was no longer controlling my body and was simply watching my life play out, like a movie.  
I was a puppet being played by an unknown master.  
I punched him back once; once only. He fell unconscious as I hit him with little force into his skull, eyes rolling back into his head as he fell. A small bit of crimson blood stained my knuckles, but it washed away easily enough.  
I simply walked away, leaving the unconscious man behind me in my wake.

Felix came back with a Sup Guy plush today. He apologised, saying that he was staying with family and that he had forgotten to bring his phone charger. I told him about the 'fight' and he smiled, telling me not to worry and that he'd take care of it.  
Felix also starts calling me Ryan now. He says that its my real name, and Cry is just a nickname, and I believe him. Why would he lie to me?  
The plush has been called Cryaotic, and we place it in a new area every night, as Felix says that it will protect us from the outside world by patrolling the house. It's pretty cute, the way he thinks like that.  
When I wake up, I go on a small hunt for it, as it always appears somewhere else than where we put it.  
I guess it's just Felix messing with me.

Felix went out to get the shopping today. I'm grateful.  
I don't want to have to go through that ordeal again.  
They don't seem to understand why I stay indoors. I don't want to go outside to face abuse and injury. I want to go outside for...sunshine and rainbows, I don't know.  
So today, Felix went instead while I did the usual _'cleaning up the mess of the domesticated PewDiePie'_ routine.  
While he was gone, I managed to get the household chores done fast enough to watch some TV. I rarely watch it, after all, 500-something channels and there's nothing to watch most of the time.  
Today, the news was on.  
**SECOND VICTIM OF HIT-AND-RUN TRUCK!  
Today, police confirmed a second fatally to this murderer, who is still on the loose in the area. Police have not yet confirmed the identity of the body, but questions are being asked about just how this criminal has evaded capture for so long. We have our best reporte-**  
I turned it off. I didn't want to hear about the damn accident anymore. I just wanted to get my life back, not to be constantly reminded about my condition that some bastard had left me in for his own sick thrills.  
Just to be on the safe side, I called Felix quickly. He was safe, talking about how he had bought me something 'fun' and completely necessary, called a 'ball gag'. I had no clue what he was talking about, and told him to hurry up and get home, before I went out there and dragged him back.  
It seemed to do the trick. He rushed back, like a small excitable puppy, a mischievous look on his face.  
Felix paused for a moment, looking at me uncertainly with a secret anxiety in his eyes. Slowly he stepped closer, his breath whispering across my neck like a gentle breeze.  
Then the distance closed between us, his lips met mine and time stopped in a heartbeat.


	5. Chapter 5

_"I throw my body from the defiled ark...  
I want to drown in beautiful lies."  
-Shangri-La, Corpse Party_

I lost myself in that sweet moment, as the world stopped around us. His lips were warm and inviting, and those sapphire eyes of his sparkled with love, an emotion I'd never been able to recognise before.  
Memories flooded back of all the times we'd had together: the kisses, those long nights of laughter and innocence...the less innocent nights. I began to piece some of my past together.  
The reason why Felix took me in. The reason why we have a song.  
We were deeply in love.  
But then, why would he want forgiveness?  
My thoughts were brushed away as arms wrapped themselves around me in a gentle hug, before one arm began to stroke my hair softly, as if he was coaxing a frightened animal out of a dark corner.  
I began to melt into Felix, slumping over his shoulder as I fell asleep, content and protected in his arms.  
Life was good again.

**"You're beginning to remember it, right? Hush...hush babe...its okay to cry..."**  
"Why are you still talking to him? You're as mad as he is!"  
**"Because I care about him, and this is the only way he'll ever...see sense..."**

The voices faded away that night, bickering to each other as I woke up with a sleeping Felix coiled around me. Not wanting to get up, I simply lie there, snuggling closer to the sleeping blonde next to me.  
Should I tell him about the voices? Would he be able to explain just what was happening to me? What if he thought I was insane, and simply left me at the hospital?  
He snores loudly, like a lion roaring, occasional words of Swedish slipping out as he tries to roll over but just gets more tangled in the bedsheets and my body. He's just too cute as he tries to figure out just why he isn't moving.  
Felix grumbles and makes small mewing noises as he slowly wakes up, eyes fluttering open and turning to face me, but I know that his brain is still asleep.  
_"Ry-Cry...R...Hi..."_  
He stumbles over the words as he draws me into a clumsy hug. I smile, but then burst out laughing as the snoring starts up again and Felix's body goes limp and heavy.  
I got up, and decided that I would have to make breakfast for us today.

When the Swede finally managed to stagger down the stairs and place the food in his mouth, after missing several times, a package was delivered. Well, 'delivered' is the wrong word.  
_'Just turned up out of nowhere'_ is a better one. I just noticed it waiting silently outside the door, a small shadow cast in the window.  
It had no address and no stamp. It was just like it had appeared out of thin air, like a ghost.  
The only word scrawled on the box was _'THIEF!'_  
A wave of dread washed over me as trembling, I brought the parcel inside, setting it down on the dining table, where Felix was now getting the hang of eating the pancakes without hitting his cheeks.  
_"Do you know what this is? It was on the doorstep...strange for the postman not to knock...don't you think?"_ I asked him, staring at the syrup decorating his face.  
_"I don't know what that is...I haven't ordered anything."_ He replied, before stuffing another pancake into his mouth.  
_"These pancakes are good though...nom."_  
I ignored Pewds then, too busy trying to find a sharp knife to open the box with. After a brief search, I managed to break through the tape and tore into the box.  
Inside, was a scrap of paper and a creepy china doll, covered in red pen with one empty black eye-socket and one eerie glass eye rolled up. It was missing an arm and was covered in dust. A disturbingly large smile was cut into its face.  
All activity in the room stopped as I picked up the note slowly, unfolding it with a sense of disease.  
I froze in fear, unsure of why I was so terrified of the single word written in red ink on the paper. Felix stared at me, holding my arm tightly as I shook.  
_"What is it? What does it say? Ryan...its going to be fine. Look at me. Its just a joke, right? Jund...Russ...someone sent that to spook us. Calm, okay? I won't let anything happen to you...alright...?"_  
I nodded, hesitantly, as my pulse began to slow. It had to be a friend. They had to know where we lived, for a start. It was just a really...cruel joke.  
_"Good...good...I won't let you get hurt. Now...what does it say...?"_  
I took a deep breath, and simply handed him the note.  
"Checkmate."


	6. Chapter 6

_"'Is there something good?'  
I asked the alternate version of myself...  
I ask myself, you tell me, you ask me here and there..."  
-Hatsune Miku, Two-Faced Lovers_

Felix froze when he read the note. His eyes flashed over it again and again, as the colour in his face drained out of him slowly. Occasional glances at the doll aside, he was locked into place with the small scrap of paper, before he threw it across the room, letting it slice through the air like a knife.  
_"I-its nothing...C-Cry...I...I have to make a few calls...yeah...nothing to worry about!"_ He stuttered, standing up and racing out of the room.  
I wonder whether he was saying that to comfort me, or himself.

After that, Felix locked himself in his room, cursing and banging away at something. I wanted to go inside and help him somehow, after all, he had done all of this for me without even needing to think about it. Somehow, I should be able to help.  
But something stopped me from entering right away. A small thud in my chest.  
The pain was enough for me to momentarily forget just what I was doing. I froze, eyes closed in slight discomfort as I tried to figure out what I was doing.  
_Right...Felix...yeah. Helping Felix. I'll just...where is that pain coming from?_  
**"Cry...just stop it. You have to send the le-"**  
The voice from my dreams, clearer this time, less distorted. Everything stopped, the pain, the clock.  
Time dragged to a halt.  
**"...The letter Cry. Can you hear me? You have to send the invitation...please..."**  
The distortion went away. My eyes widened.  
It couldn't be him. It just couldn't. It wouldn't make sense.  
_Felix. Pewds. Pewdie._  
What invitation? The only thing I'd received was the doll and the note. There were no parties, no celebrations I should know about. What was he referring to?  
**"You'll...understand...when the time is right...I miss you..."**  
Time restarted with a jolt, causing me to be hit with some sort of recoil.  
A voice began to drift through the door, and I remained still, trying to catch every single word he said.  
_"You...please go away...you ruined us once...not again...I know...I was oblivious to it once, please...Marzia...let him rest..."_  
A small voice mumbled out of the room, filled with venom, with a shrill laugh.  
It sent ice running down my spine. It was her, the person from my dreams, this Marzia. She was bad. I didn't know why, but I knew she was evil.  
I turned away, becoming cold and isolated as a dark cloud stormed over me. Grabbing my jacket, I fled outside, angry and unstable all of a sudden.  
That voice. All of this was her fault.  
I laughed, a strange crazed laugh that didn't sound myself. A loud beeping noise started to infect my senses, getting faster and louder, making my pulse race like the war drums stimulates the solider into courage.  
I had to find something, anything, to take this fury out on.  
A dark alleyway enclosed me. I was alone, letting pure silence take me prisoner except for that damn noise inside my head, causing those lines of reality and imagination to become blurred.  
I ran, grasping my head as it began to hurt, thumping in time with the beat of my pulse. I couldn't outrun it, it just became louder and louder and more and more painful until I gave up, head resting on a railing, fingers tapping out that same _1-2 1-2_rhythm endlessly. The laugh escaped me as my legs gave way, and I became a sobbing heap on the dirty floor. Dead bodies and blood surrounded me as I broke down into floods of tears, and as my vision turned crimson.  
As my vision entirely faded, I heard a small rustling sound in the distance.  
Small, scared footsteps.  
_And then I was gone._

Felix's beautiful blue eyes were the first thing I saw when I woke up. They were wide in fear.  
_"Cry? Cry, can you hear me? Please...never do that again...you gave me a heart attack...you were...you were in that dark alley...laughing and crying. You...you said that 'Cry doesn't live here anymore'...I'm scared okay? I'm...I'm going to need you to tell me everything...something bad, really bad happened before and I want to prevent that. But you need to tell me everything, okay? I have an idea...but I need your help..."_  
I grasped him tightly, never wanting to let go. I burst out in tears, not really knowing why. Felix stroked my head gently, giving me a strong hug and a small kiss on the cheek.  
_"It doesn't have to be now...I think you need some rest...hey, you listening?"_  
I didn't care by this point.  
I was already asleep.


	7. Chapter 7

_"How, then, am I mad? Hearken! And observe how healthily- how calmly I can tell you the whole story..."  
-Edgar Allen Poe, The Tell-Tale Heart_

I awoke carefully tucked away in bed.  
My head ached, I was cold, and the room danced before my eyes.  
Slamming my eyes shut, I waited. Waited for the room to settle. Tried to remember more.  
It had been a routine the doctors had given me, after I came out of my coma, and after all of the psychological exams. Heh...I remember the exams. Stupid little dots on a piece of paper that should have magically transformed into images before my eyes. Pewds looked at my results afterwards, and said that they all looked like dicks...and then he...he...I don't know.  
Anyway, after the tests I was allowed home, and they said that this routine of trying to remember when the brain was half asleep made a fancy percentage of people remember more.  
I didn't believe it. I had, in fact, ironically forgotten the 'memory routine' altogether.  
With nothing better to do, I tried it.

**"-hat? Ryan, no! Don't do this-"**  
"F..elix... g-go..."  
**"...I...I missed you Ryan...but I can't-"**

Silence.  
I heard the voices clearly. They were not talking to each other, but replying to someone else.  
A fuzzy image flickered into view.  
Felix, running across the road, with me trying desperately to keep up. He ignored me as I called out to him, crying and yelling something unknown before he got to the other side of the pavement, looked over his shoulder and gave me a look of absolute fear. I've never seen him so scared in all his life.  
Then glaring lights shone into the side of my face, and the world vanished into a mixture of darkness and squealing tyres.

My eyes flew open, as I shot up in bed and instantly regretted it. My head screamed in pain, and I slowly leant back into the covers. Felix was asleep in a chair next to the bed, peacefully unconscious with his messy hair all over his face.  
A light snoring came from him, causing his chest to slightly rise and fall.  
I laughed as a small lock of hair was picked up by his wispy breathing and floated up and down along with his chest.  
Suddenly, the pain faded away as I got an evil idea. One so cruel...it just had to be done.  
Slowly, I got out of bed, and got to work.

Felix was not happy when he saw what he looked like.  
_"The hell Cry? What the actual hell? I swear...you're evil..."_  
He looked extremely fabulous, as he likes to keep saying, with his new look. Pewds was covered in bright pink lipstick, blue eyeliner and other forms of make-up that I don't know.  
He grumbled as he rubbed his face, trying to get the variety of colour off his face, but only succeeding in mixing the colours into a dirty orange colour that was now all over his face and hands. I broke out into hysterics.  
That caused him to smile, and he tried to kiss me, but I jerked away before he could touch me with his hands.  
_"Get all of that off first."_  
Pewdie chuckled, and walked off into the bathroom, sighing with mock hurt as he lunged for me again, with no luck.  
_"Where did you find this stuff, anyway? Are you not telling me something Ryan?"_ Felix winked, and I just pulled a face.  
_"I actually found it on your computer desk...didn't know you were into that kinda stuff..."_ I stared at him with a judging look as he shuffled into the bathroom, trying not to touch anything.

When Felix came out of the bathroom, he had a dark look in his eyes. I couldn't place my finger on what it was. It was a stormy look, as if an inferno of flames was raging inside his irises.  
He was finally scrubbed clean, and was just standing there, in the hallway, not saying a word.  
_"P-Pewds?"_  
No response.  
_"Felix...something wrong?"_  
Still nothing.  
He looked devoid of life, as if someone had reanimated a corpse. I gulped, approaching this still figure in fear.  
Suddenly, Pewds pushed me against the wall and began to kiss me, hands securing my wrists to the wall as his tongue swiped across my lips and into my mouth, exploring it. The speed of it all left me breathless and scared, as my brain tried desperately to keep up with what was happening, before overloading and turning off altogether.  
Felix was dragging me into the bedroom, nails leaving dents in my skin as I was pulled and tugged onto the bed.  
Those crystal eyes pierced me, darkened with lust as I tried to get up. Pewds straddled my body quickly, and ripped off my shirt with an animalistic snarl. A loud, deep growl was coming from his throat as feverish kisses and sharp bites were etched into my skin, hands weaving into my hair.  
Suddenly, those hands were on my stomach, talons carving into my pale skin ruthlessly as I squirmed under his control, trying to escape.  
He slapped me then, hard across the face, as I gave up trying to fight, and instead, let a small psychotic laugh ball up inside me, growing louder and bigger the more I thought about it, until it wriggled out of my lips and echoed around my mind.  
Felix froze in horror as I simply laughed. I don't know why, but I did. Everything was just so...so very...f...funny...and...hilarious. I couldn't...stop.  
_"Oh...you crack me up Felix...how you seriously thought that you were in control, like I was your little bitch or something...heheheh...its too funny really..."_  
Then I fell asleep, letting the laughter consume me into a dream of insanity and sex, where I was in control. My brain had stopped working ages ago.  
No, it was time for the nightmares to sort out the problems, and for me to awake in the morning.  
Now that I think about it...the same thing happened in that alleyway...and with the fight...  
I didn't care.  
Felix would take care of me, sort me out in the morning.  
Until then, I would rest.  
Until the control comes back, I would be okay.  
_"Round and round and round and round...while the earth is spin-ning..."_


End file.
